In this latest installment of the Batman / Superman saga Zack Synder manages to do something that no other director has done before. That is to make a super hero movie that is difficult to understand, lacks any real plot yet has some pretty interesting battle scenes and is generally a steaming hot mess of a movie.
The movie opens with the totally unnecessary rehashing of Bruce Wayne’s ( Ben Affleck) formative years where his parents were slain as they left the theatre. It then goes on to show how Batman for some unknown reason has left Gotham and is pretty upset that there seems to be another caped crusader roaming his new city, being all heroic.
So Batman gets all broody and sets out to one up Superman ( Henry Cavill) and prove that there is some kind of shady dealings going on in Metropolis. He suspects the somewhat maniacal and yet nerdy Lex Luthor ( Jesse Eisenberg) is behind the grand plot to either destroy or take over the world with his Ukrainian or Russian or some other stereotypical Eastern European hired gun ( Australia’s Callan Mulvey in his US big screen debut) assisting him, to design the perfect weapon.
Batman has a few odd dream sequences that make little to no sense, whilst Lois Lane ( Amy Adams) just flicks between trying to seem intelligent and a damsel in distress that Superman keeps flying in to rescue. Chuck in Wonder Woman ( Gal Gadot) for no apparent reason other than aesthetics and a small role in the final battle scene and it’s a party, complete with a monster sent to destroy everyone; resembling a giant turd with teeth that has burst from a messy amniotic sack and is seemingly pissed off. Luckily Lois Lane manages to retrieve a kryptonite staff for Superman to slay the giant turd monster.
If the creators of the Marvel franchise were ever worried that the DC franchise might become a threat, this movie lets them know they can rest easy. This movie struggles to be entertaining or even cohesive. There are confusing sub plots that the viewer is just expected to put together all the pieces of the miserable mess that is trying too hard.
With the exception of the always wooden Affleck the rest are not terrible actors, they just struggle with an awful script making it impossible for all involved. Superman just swans around looking broody and gorgeous whilst rescuing anything out of a burning building (mostly just Lois) whilst Lex Luthor is simply annoying and when he speaks or appears on-screen its kind of like nails on a black board it’s that bad. His high-pitched voice and bizarre ramblings are just strange and not at all productive to the character. When Alfred’s( Jeremy Irons) voice crackles down the intercom to Batman during a flight scene to sardonically pose the question ” How best to describe it” he sums up the entire terrible plot in that one succinct sentence.